I’ve been doing the occasional Planning Status Haiku or Reversed Haiku in the side bar over the last year or so, to keep myself amused and you informed (how time files when you’re having paperwork).

But poetry’s never been my strong point, so here’s some rather tedious exposition.

Daniel ‘The Hand’ Lamin, having steered our new land and old shack purchase through the CU, has prepared all the documentation for the Permis de Construire. He was supposed to have a meeting with the man from the newly created SPANK last week, who’s just back from a week’s holiday, about exactly where our sewerage will go. Then the paperwork will go off (if this is too boring you can go off and make a cup of tea if you like – oh, you’ve already gone) and, with a follow-up phone call from the mayor, come back in about a month. Approved. Hopefully.

(I ran into the mayor in town the other day – she looking very smart, me covered in the various layers of mud that say ‘English’ around here. She looked and said she was very happy for us, that it was all coming together at last. “Do you have a yurt up yet?” she asked. “No,” I said. “I’m just putting up a platform for the kids’ play yurt,” I added, thinking my platform may have been reported to her by an ill-meaning local. “Do whatever you want,” she said. We love our mayor.)

When we have the permis, we will have a meeting with the Notaire (solicitor), and the shack and land owner, buy the land and shack, put down adobe floors for a 26-foot and 18-foot yurt, and move in. It’s only taken just over two years at this point to go and “live in a tent in a field”. And we’re not even going to be in a field. Observably ridiculous.

There. I can get back to more interesting posts now. How was the tea?

Got a phone call from Daniel this morning.

You remember Daniel. He’s the guy who gave us a hand when the Planning Department refused our old application.

I write ‘gave us a hand’. What I really mean is: ‘submitted an efficient, effective, astonishingly detailed attack on the Planning Department’s refusal to give us the CU (Certificat d’Urbanisme) we so clearly deserved’.

He’s also the guy who’s been giving us a hand with our new property purchase.

I write ‘giving us a hand’. What I really mean is: ‘single-handedly persuaded a reluctant neighbour to sell us their small, ugly building on an adjoining piece of land that would allow us to circumvent the previous planning refusal (the Daniel-written rebuttal for which is currently celebrating its first birthday at the tribunal in Bordeaux), before submitting a CU application to make the small, ugly building bigger and more beautiful, bizarrely enabling us to live next door to it in our yurts, while having up to 20 guests (actually, we’re only going to have around 12 tops) in yurts where we originally intended – an astonishingly detailed application that has proven to be both efficient and effective’.

Because Daniel’s phone call this morning was to tell us that our new CU has been approved. (APPROVED!) The evidence is apparently in the post (and not just this one).

The first fight is over. Me and Her Outdoors have so much tension draining from us, we feel like amoeba. Albeit amoeba with a bluddie good excuse to drink Champagne and with a huge amount of work in front of us.

But enough about us.

What Daniel is going to do now is give us a hand with our Permis de Construire.

I say ‘give us a hand’. What I really mean is: ‘submit a dossier detailing exactly what we’re going to do to the small, ugly building – which Planning cannot apparently refuse – for which we can expect an answer in about a month – after which we can start doing what we were expecting to do a year and a half ago.

That’s almost not the point. This is: I recently learned Daniel’s surname. I won’t spell it for you, but I’ll tell you how it’s pronounced: “La Man”. It’s not only significant in the United Statesian sense (“Who da man? Dan da man”), but as you may remember from school, the French word pronounced “Man” means “hand”.

If you’ve been following this blog for a long while, you may also remember that we found our land a few hundred metres (yards) from a place pronounced “La Land”.

Which is why I’m now interested in meeting the following people: “La Horse Cart”, “La Plough” and “La Free Solar Panel”.