Just before the ad break, comes a moment like this. A moment when you go: “How are they going to get out of that?”

The mayor was not surprised to hear that he did not approve of our project. Our land is not in a constructible zone, he said. (“But the previous owner had permission to build?” I said.). The department of agriculture objects because there is forest, he said. (“Yes, but…” I said.) In France it is Yes or No, he said. (In French.) They also object because there is a steep slope (“…?”). A woman from Planning objects to the compost toilets, he said. And nobody wants yurts.

The big cliffhanger is the thing about not being in a constructible zone. How did the previous owner get permission to build? Was there anything underhand? Did we buy the land under false pretenses? Is it worth less now than it was when we bought it? What will our brilliant estate agent say tomorrow? What will our solicitor say next week? What solutions will we come up with after several glasses of wine? And will we remember in the morning?

In the meantime, here’s an advertisement for French schooling. It’s the menu for Monday and Tuesday this week at the daughter’s school. An education in food – which costs us about €15 a month.